We are in a time of a great shift, one where we are being challenged to release our past including our beliefs around who we are. We are challenged to change our perception around experiences that have hurt us and the stories we’ve told ourselves all these years to make sense of it all. We carry inner wounds, many so deeply hidden we have traveled through life blissfully unaware of how they have impacted our behavior and the lives of the people around us. As we peel back the deeper layers of our experience, we find our inability to cope with our feelings has created negative patterns of behavior. We bury emotions stuffing anything uncomfortable deep down to avoid discomfort.
These patterns worked for a while, we medicated and avoided feeling. As kids we came up with survival tools like becoming invisible or funny or maybe we were the fixer or good student in the family. We assumed our roles and played them well. What if we aren’t that person anymore? Maybe we aren’t the black sheep or the “perfect” child, yet we continue to betray our true selves by continuing to act our parts in the never-ending play. Over time, our emotions that haven’t been addressed start to seep out. They present as illness, weight gain, anxiety or depression. They manifest in behaviors like addiction and or a belief that we aren’t “good” people. Shame seeps in, as our behaviors and reality start reflecting our inner story (not our inner being). Finding things to numb out like video games, food, sex, drugs, shopping or alcohol might work for awhile until we realize these things feel great in the moment then leave us with that constant empty feeling inside.
The discomfort we are feeling or not feeling directly correlates to our energy and inner being. Are we living an authentic life? Are we doing things that align and feel right to us? How often do we speak our truth? Do we diminish our light to make others feel comfortable? Where are we wearing masks to please the people around us and disconnecting with our authentic self? What are we choosing that we’ve long outgrown in terms of relationships, jobs or circle of friends? When we are in alignment, we never sacrificing a part of us to do or be something for someone else. Aligning with truth means sometimes disappointing someone. We should never have to prove our worth to justify our authentic self.
We are being asked to elevate and change as a planet and collective human experience. Our reality is triggering and forcing everything to the surface. This includes the truth of who we are, why we are here, and the false identities we have been presenting as our own. The opportunity to release and transcend all the noise is showing up and rocking people’s worlds! The chronic betrayal of the soul must stop so we can heal and become whole and complete. This requires going deep and owning our past without judgment. Those experiences shaped who we are. They gave us strength, courage, compassion and so much more. It’s hard when the people around us continue to participate in the charade, but the time is now to own our truth and embrace who we are.
Healing requires going deep into our cesspool of emotion to face ourselves. Let’s acknowledge that for most of us, there were no parental role models showing us how to cope with emotional stuff. It’s not that our parents were good or bad (let’s release the judgment) they simply weren’t given tools to manage their stress or face reality in a healthy way. Family issues were quietly swept under the rug, we never openly discussed anything uncomfortable. We didn’t air our dirty laundry. Many of us can relate to holding a level discomfort deep inside because of a story we told ourselves to cope as children. The good news is we can choose to heal ourselves. We must be gentle with ourselves through the process of releasing our past, as we allow it to fade and step into our future. Suffering was part of the journey, not a final destination.
Working our way into the deep recesses of our “stuff” means learning to feel. Instead of stating the obvious around why things are the way they are (which is a great deflection tool), ask how you feel about something. What are the feelings coming up around your situation? Lose the explanations and focus on the feelings. How do you feel about your relationships? What kinds of fears are coming up for you? Maybe we are in a constant state of anxiety and don’t know why. This is an opportunity to peel back a layer and ask deeper questions. We must feel the answers instead of explaining them in a cognitive way.
When we become practiced at feeling, then comes the deeper work of exploring why we feel that way. Get curious around where these feelings are coming from. This is difficult for masters of emotional avoidance. Sometimes the answers catch us by surprise. Family dynamics usually come into play or perhaps some trauma that has never been addressed. Finding the why leads to compassion and understanding towards ourselves. Know it was all an experience and we are stronger and wiser for it. If it’s hard to accept the past, seek professional help. It’s not something that has to be navigated alone.
The final step is letting it all go. Honor it, process it, release it. People hold suffering like a security blanket. Some people are defined by it and don’t know who they are without it. Let’s all set ourselves free! Everything that no longer serves us weighs us down like ballast on a hot air balloon. It’s time to rise!