Easter Sunday my husband had to work all day. He had some sort of work emergency which left me to my own devices the entire day. I’m usually not out and about by myself on the weekends, but this day I decided to go to Rothko Chapel which is a few miles from my house. It’s one of the 300 most spiritual places on earth. It is an Octagon shaped building with meditation cushions and benches inside for people to reflect or meditate. In the center of the Octagon was a meditation cushion on a carpeted square. I decided I might as well sit in the center of one of the most spiritual places and meditate on this holy day. I took in the light and the silence. I was there for an hour and a half and it felt like minutes.
I then went outside and walked down to this park which has one of my favorite ancient Oak trees and I sat on a branch enjoying a perfect Houston day. I walked across the street to this red swing hanging from another huge oak tree. I got on the swing with the sunlight on my face and a light breeze blowing I felt completely free. I felt like I did when I was 4 years old on my swing in my backyard. No worries with families all around me having picnics and enjoying the park with their dogs and kids. After swinging for awhile I went to one of my favorite cafés for lunch and then came home for a 2-hour power nap.
My day was pure bliss. The weather was amazing, which for Houston is rare. I spent the entire day by myself doing whatever I wanted and enjoying the luxury of time. I went out to a nice dinner with my husband Mike. I realized that my day was perfect because I had no expectations. I just followed my heart from one thing to the next and allowed whatever happened to happen. There was no agenda or timeline, no family expectations or obligations.
When I surrender to the moment and allow myself to follow my heart there are never wrong decisions or detours. I am in this space of presence. I’m not running a negative tape through my head, I’m detached from any outcomes or expectations, which means there is never personal disappointment. I have shifted from striving to BEING. I’ve stepped back from what society tells us is necessary for happiness.
Society tells us we must achieve, hit income markers, compete, and win to find happiness. I disagree, we must be kind to ourselves, honor our truth, and love ourselves. We must accept others for who they are, their beliefs and ideas, their decisions and life choices. We must know that we are enough. Happiness doesn’t come from anything external, we will never be able to buy happiness, ever. When we continue to seek happiness from external things, we are trying to fill a bottomless well, one of discontent. Only the realization that we are enough, and we are complete, will set us free. This is the knowing that we have everything we need, and the Universe has our back.
Our only limitations are the ones we place on ourselves. The only barriers to true success are the constructs of the mind. They are the stories we’ve told ourselves about how we have failed, or not lived up to our expectations of who we needed to be by now. It is time to shed those old beliefs and know that we possess everything we need to become the people we were born to be. We have the intellect, the skills, the tools, and the exact amount of ambition to step fully on our path. The key is allowing the path to unfold. The key is following our intuition and heart to turn the right direction at the forks in the road. There are no wrong turns because our lives are full of detours and loops but somehow, we always end up right where we need to be right on time.
It is time to allow our light to shine. It is time to be gentle with ourselves. It is time to enjoy the luxury of an afternoon on a swing, or mountain or spent at the beach to find ourselves. It is time to be on our own team and lose the fear and negativity that holds us down every day. Wherever we are on our journey, it’s never too late to step fully on our path. It took me 50 years to become who I was meant to be, and the best is yet to come.
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